Cookies
by L's Doppelganger
Summary: Just read it, please. I fail at summaries. Rated T to be safe.
1. Chapter 1

Yet another Death Note fiction. Applause, applause...not really. Try to enjoy....

Pairings: None (Sorry, yaoi fans. And I don't think you could really count Misa/Light, as it is so one-sided).

Disclaimer: I own nothing relevant to Death Note.

--

BUZZ! BUZZ! BUZZ! BU-

-SMASH!-

Light pounded the 'snooze' button with a white-knuckled fist, sending the alarm clock plummeting to the floor. Who set the alarm on a weekend...? he thought fuzzily. Closing his eyes once again, he curled up in his blanket and snuggled his head into the pillow, savoring the wonderful rest....

Suddenly, the blanket was ripped away, waking Light with a gasp as his eyelids flew open.  
"Wha...!" He heard a squeaky giggle.  
"Light, I thought you should get up now!" Misa.... She tittered again as he sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes lazily.  
"Sigh...Misa...," he said, not intending to finish the sentence. She thought it cute, or something, to annoy him, apparently. Why couldn't she just...disappear?  
"Come on, Light!" she squealed, grabbing his arm. She was futilely tugging on him as he turned his head to look at the alarm clock, then realizing it was on the floor.  
"Misa-a," he nearly whined, withdrawing his arm and tucking it under himself. "Hmph!" She left the room in a huff, her destination unknown.  
She's gone.... he quietly rejoiced and reached down to grab the blanket Misa threw on the floor, wrapping himself in it..

_Dammit._

Light groaned and whipped the blanket off onto the floor, probably with more force than necessary. Sitting up, he swiveled around and stood, stretching his arms above his head with a sigh.  
_Can't sleep now. Thanks, Misa._  
He scuffled over to the walk-in closet, shutting the door. He snatched a grey button-down shirt, fiddling with the top two buttons.

Then, a faint tapping on the door. He stood listening; _tap, tap, tap, tap_.  
"Light-kun," said a voice, obviously L's. "Why don't you come out of the closet now?" he said loudly. Hearing a mousey giggle, he assumed Misa had gone to L seeking assistance.  
"I-," _Wait, was that suggestive?_ Disgruntled, he didn't know how to reply. "I'm getting dressed, L," he finally said. He hurriedly slipped on a shirt and jammed his legs into some jeans, then flung the door open.  
_THUD_, -feminine gasp-.  
Light peered around the open door in confusion to see L lying on the floor, rubbing his head.  
"Ouch," he said with no exclamation, standing up.  
"I'm sorry, L," Light said smoothly. "I didn't realize you were standing so close to the door."  
L looked at him blankly. "Is that so...," he deadpanned.  
"Yes...it is...." A long pause drew out as they eyed each other suspiciously, Light determined not to avert first. Without a word, L walked into the other room.

--

L looked down at the strawberry that had fallen to the floor. He made a small grunt, resuming his consumption of the cake before him. As he chewed, he listened to the slow strides emanating from down the hall and approached his way. Light then came into view, trudging into the kitchen. He took a seat across from L.  
"Good morning." L looked up in mock surprise.  
"Awake now, yes?" Light studied the crouched man as he ate, reminding him of his own hunger. However, he remained seated.

A small gnat flew around, buzzing inquisitively around L's head, who simply ignored it. It made its rounds, then decidedly zipped over to Light. He waved it away, slightly irked. The determined insect flew around the deterrent, landing on the table beside Light's hand. L observed over his cake, studying Light's reactions. As the gnat landed, Light raised his forefinger and casually crushed it where it was. L put a thumb to his lip.  
"Hmm...," L hummed, drawing Light's attention as he wiped his finger on a napkin.  
"What is it?"  
"There is now a twenty-eight-percent chance that you are Kira," said L quietly. Light folded his arms across his chest and sighed.  
"You're still going at that?" he said calmly. He was growing tired of having to restrict everything he does to avoid a percentage-raise. L simply looked at him, then took a bite of cake. Light stayed silent, waiting for him to elaborate. L ignored him, taking a sip of tea. Light sighed.

"So," Light began, "where did Misa run off to?" Honestly, he didn't care much, but he was making conversation.  
"She asked me to tell you..." replied L, "she is going to the mall." Light smirked.  
"Alright, then." More awkwardness as silence ensued.

_ Light-kun seems to be uncomfortable_. L finished his food, staring at the vacant plate. _While I am perfectly content in silence, he must be quite unnerved_.  
"Well," Light said, interrupting L's reverie, "I think I will just go in the other room... no Misa to bother me while I try to sleep, now." L looked at him from the corner of his eye. _I wonder why he is smirking in such a way... could he be planning something? No, surely he wouldn't try something while he knew I was in such close vicinity. That would be absurd. Perhaps he only is in need of rest_. L shrugged mentally, drawing circles in the crumbs on his plate.

--

The afternoon sun shone brightly through the window, casting an uncomfortable glint over Light's sleeping eyes.  
_Ugh._  
He picked his head up without shifting his body to look at his watch. 1:43 p.m., he thought without much conviction. It was the weekend. He noticed L, sitting in his odd fashion at the end of the couch. He appeared to be watching television, but he couldn't tell if he was napping.  
"L, are you awake?" he rasped. L didn't respond. "L?" Without thinking, he shoved the detective with his foot, demanding a reaction. L flailed his arms for balance, eventually taking a death-grip on the arm rest.  
"I was awake, Light-kun." He said it a little louder than usual, irritation mildly coloring his voice.  
"Then why didn't you answer me?" asked Light calmly. He ignored him, gazing at the TV set. Light shifted himself vertically on the couch, scratching the back of his head. He glanced at L, who continued to frustrate him. Sighing, he got up to find something to eat.

Opening a cupboard door, he scanned the contents. Nothing. Only 'L food'. With a shrug of his shoulders, he reached forward to take a box of some sort of cookie, peeling back the plastic exterior with an obnoxious crackle. He took three morsels and placed the bag into its previous place in the cupboard.

_L probably won't mind... I'll just take these three, and that's all. And if he does mind...well, I will most likely escape suspicion._ Light eyed the three grasped in his fingers. _Unless he counts the cookies... that will be a problem. No, what are the odds of that?_ he thought confidently, popping one into his mouth. Not bad._ But... it _is _L... Perhaps I could-  
_Suddenly he heard a rustling of couch cushions. He hastily stuffed the two remaining treats into his right pocket, wiping the crumbs off his mouth roughly, smearing them on the back of his pants. In a heated panic, he half-leaped to the refrigerator, thrusting the doors open.  
As L shuffled into the kitchen, hands in pockets, he saw Light, who appeared to be browsing for something in the refrigerator. Light whipped his head around his shoulder to look at L. "Hello, L," he greeted him. L ignored it. He took several steps closer to Light, locking eyes with him. He stopped when he was nearly six inches from his face and promptly sniffed.  
"Hm..."  
Light gulped quietly. _He thinks my secretive behavior makes me more eligible to be Kira... I have to act nonchalant._ With a slightly disturbed expression, Light closed the refrigerator doors and faced L.  
"What is it, Ryuzaki?" he folded his arms over his chest, masking the irritation in his voice. L moved closer, bursting the bubble of Light's personal space. _He is hiding something...._ L scanned the counters for sign of disturbances. The cupboard door. It wasn't shut entirely. Focusing his attention on Light again, he smirked mischievously and walked over to the little door. Reaching up, he opened it and took down the box of cookies Light had. While staring at Light, L pulled back on the plastic seal. _Light-kun has taken..._ he looked in the box, _approximately three cookies...._ _It is quite suspicious how he fears my knowledge of it. Perhaps he was planning to drug them, and then replace them_.  
"Light-kun," said L. Light looked at him.  
"What?" he said, bemused.  
"Where are the other two?"  
Light stared at him. _No! L, you bastard!_ "Ryuzaki, what are you saying?"  
L held pointed at the box. "Where are the other two you took from here?"  
_Damn!_ "The other two what, L?" Light was losing his smooth tone. L shuffled towards him, extending the box. "_My cookies_."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two.

Pairings: None

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Rated "T" appropriately.

---

L stared at Light with unblinking eyes, waiting for a response. Light cursed internally.  
_  
I could just admit to it... _He conjured up an idea of how the argument might resolve: _"You're right, Ryuzaki..." I would speak with a smooth tone, _he decided. _"I did take a few of your cookies." L would then wait for me to elaborate. I wouldn't pause long enough to make it seem like I was thinking up something in my head, or short enough to make it seem premeditated. I would then apologize, saying, "I'm sorry, I didn't know it would offend you." I would make it somewhat sincere, but not so that it would seem cheesy.... L would probably accept it, but secretly he would suspect my guilt. I would then offer some kind of compensation, like "Do you want me to go buy another package?" and L will obviously decline. I will ask him if he is sure about that, and he will reassure me, then probably walk away...._

Meanwhile, L was imagining his own version of the dispute...  
_Hmm... Light will most likely admit to taking them. He would expect me to wait for him to continue with his explanation... however... I could then take advantage of his predictability by taking a close step towards him, in a more aggressive manner as if to interrogate him.... Mm, that would indeed throw his train of thought off track, but... I could let it go further. Not to mention that I would be slightly uncomfortable with that myself.... Yes, I could let him try to tell me why he took them. He will apologize, and I will of course accept... unless I don't let it go. But what purpose would that hold...? Hmm, I should just play along.... No, that is what he is expecting. I will do something completely out of the ordinary.... He will be startled. Yes... I think I will do this...._

_Light,_

_L,_

_**I already know what you're planning, and I will not allow you to win.  
**  
_

Light smirked. "Well, Ryuzaki," he began smoothly, as planned (and also expected), "I think you have this all wrong."  
L stared, unblinking, at Light's face. "Is that so, Light?" He absently chewed on his thumbnail. "Then what are these?" He took a step toward Light, leaving only a handbreadth size space between them.  
Light raised his eyebrows in bewilderment; he backed away slightly. This reaction was predictable, however, L's advance was not. L reached around Light into his back pocket, in the most awkward manner- a near embrace- keeping his thumb to his mouth, to Light's utter shock and disconcertion.  
"R-Ryuzaki! What are you doing?" The urge to punch him was overwhelming, but he decided against that. L located the snacks in his back pocket, grabbing them and pulling them out. "This," he said, holding up the slightly crushed things in front of Light's face, "is my evidence."  
Light stared at L in disbelief_.  
He... he practically assaulted me! I underestimated you, L... Damn it! How could I not see that he would do something so bold?  
_"This is not all," L said, unruffled, lowering the cookies. "I have reason to believe you have in fact eaten a cookie before you thought to do otherwise," he admonished.  
Light crossed his arms. "I don't know how you could prove that I did."  
"Simple."  
"Oh?"  
"Yes."

L suddenly reached forward to Light's face, quickly slipped his index finger into his mouth, and pulled it back out. Light's eyes stretched wide as L then inserted that finger into his own mouth, tasting it.  
Light gaped at him. No time for gathered thoughts- he spoke his mind: "What the hell, Ryuzaki?!"  
L glanced at him, then looked at the ceiling, smacking his lips.  
"Yes," he began, unaffected, "you have in fact ingested one of these." He stated it so matter-of-factly. Light still only gaped at him in shock. L continued, "I couldn't judge by your breath alone, so I decided that was the best course of action to take."  
Light was in knots. "Best course of action!" he exclaimed skeptically. "What about asking me? Did you think of that, L!"  
"You have given me reasons to not believe everything you say is factual." He paused. "You seem offended by my conclusion."  
Light was not offended, but angered. Partially because L "beat" him by making the first move, and partially because he was so very disturbed by what he had just experienced.  
"...No, I'm not offended." he said, distraught. He fixed his eyes into L's dark orbs_._ "You..." Light trailed off, at a loss for words.  
_I feel violated...._

_I see, Light..._ L discerned. _You are perturbed by my invasive behavior... now, let us experiment with you and test the extent of your temperament...._

Light was still staring at L, thoroughly disturbed. Suddenly, L reached up to poke Light's cheek.  
Light's expression turned from irked to to entirely annoyed. "What are you doing?!" he shouted at him. Light smacked his hand away forcefully, entirely irritated. Immediately following Light's retaliation, L presented a counter of his own; he took a giant step towards the other, successfully closing the space between them and snagging the top of Light's pants waistband with his hand- a very offensive gesture.  
Light was murderous. "Damn it, Ryuzaki!" He grabbed the detective by the shirt, pulling him up off of the floor and thus scattering the cookies in his hand. He became helpless in this posture, and Light threw him across the room with a growl. L landed hard, ramming face-first into the cabinets; his lip and nose began to bleed.  
"Ouch..." He rose to his hands and knees, slowly getting up from the floor. "Why so violent, Light?" he said dully, studying the blood on his face, which dripped down to stain his white shirt. _That actually was quite painful...  
_Light crossed his arms, fuming. "What is the matter with you?"  
L was about to stand up completely... but he lacked the time. Light had stormed over to him in a bout of hysteria when he didn't reply, and L was nearly startled his approach. Nearly.

He grabbed L by the shirt on his chest, swinging him up to eye-level and slamming his back into the wall. L grunted and flinched at the impact. Light shoved him into the wall harder.

_Ah... you show your true colors._

"What was the meaning of that?" Light demanded loudly, his white knuckles pressing painfully into L's chest. Blood from L's nose ran down over his chin and neck, saturating the collar of his shirt and Light's hands. Air involuntarily escaped L's lungs. He opened his eyes and stared directly into Light's, unafraid.  
"Ah...-" L couldn't take in a breath. Light gripped his shirt tightly, suffocating L's lungs.  
_I... I can't breathe. _L thought, still calmly. _He very well may crack a rib. I have to do something... now...!  
_Suddenly, L swiftly withdrew his arms into his shirt, abandoning the sleeves, ducked out of his garment entirely and leaving the thing in Light's hands. Taken by surprise, Light turned to face him. Breathing quite heavily, L had assumed a defending position, with one foot extended in front of him and his arms upraised in a preparation to block. Awkward and gangly, yet strangely solid he looked without a shirt. Light noticed two red pressure-marks on his chest and the blood spattered on the floor, realizing he might have actually hurt him_.  
I have to regain my composure... but that was just really... **weird**..._**  
**  
Light began to notice his ruthless behavior. He dropped the shirt with a sigh, which was perceived as a sign of truce.  
"...Are you alright?" L asked cautiously, marginally disgruntled.  
_Me? Why is he asking if I'm alright...?_ "What do you mean? I was the one who attacked you."  
"I was referring to your mental state."

Oh. "... Yes, I'm fine."  
L relinquished his armed stance, standing to his normal posture and wiped the blood from his mouth across his bare arm.  
"Ryuzaki, I'm sorry... that was entirely unnecessary," Light apologized, only then really taking notice of the blood that had gushed over L's upper-body... not to mention the floor. "However, I can't help but wonder why it is that you provoked me like that."  
L hummed. "I accept your apology." He paused, then, "I 'provoked' you purposefully to gauge your temperament."

_...What?_

"Really... so, you decided to assault me because you wanted to see how annoyed I would get?" he asked, disbelieving.  
"Mm, yes, I believe so."  
Light shrugged. "Whatever you say, Ryuzaki..."  
"Then I say you're Kira."  
"No, that's not what I meant-"  
" Then I suggest you say what you mean, Light Yagami."  
"I was just stating my indifference behind the reasoning for your 'experimenting'."  
L absently put his hands in his pockets, but then consciously took them out. "Very well."

_I don't think I've ever bled like that..._ L deadpanned. _What is wrong with this man? No, what is wrong with him is that he is Kira... most likely. However, I must admit... I would act similarly if the situation reversed. This operation turned out to be moot._

"Well, Ryuzaki," Light addressed him after a long silence."I don't think you want to wear this shirt..." Light held it up, displaying the blood-spatters and stains.  
L put his bloodied thumb to his bloodied mouth. "No, not really."

Suddenly, the two heard a jingling of keys in the front door. To their abrupt realization, Misa was home.  
She pushed the door open, calling out to Light, "Li-ight! I'm home now!"  
L looked at Light for his response, and when he didn't, he smirked. "Your soul-mate is calling, Light," L said facetiously. Light rolled his eyes.  
"Light?" Misa squeaked. "Um, Ryuzaki??" She ambled down to their location, in the kitchen. Peering around the wall, she briefly screamed at the following scene:

There was Light, standing on the west wall of the kitchen, with a gore-stained shirt in his slightly bloodied hands, and L opposite to him, wearing nothing but his jeans. There were pulverized crumbs and blood spatters covering the floor. She looked up at L again, covering her mouth as she gasped. The two men had remained staring at each other until they heard her gasp, then they looked at her. The now semi-wet blood had streamed down from L's nose and mouth, covering that area and spider-webbing down his neck and chest.  
She gulped. "Wha... what happened?"

**_-----  
Author's Note: Sorry for delaying... I became discouraged after over-analyzing my previous story, but thanks to a certain person, I feel better about my "writing skills._**

Well, that's it. I was going to write another chapter after this to conclude, but I decided against that because there'd only be about one-half of a paragraph to go. So, use your imaginations.


End file.
